are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
