You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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