At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
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