i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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