Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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