She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
