I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
