Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
