Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
