i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
