Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Randomize
