she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Boobs are out for the taking
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
