he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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