awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Randomize