I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
