I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
