I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
