Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
