If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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