Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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