im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
