Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
