I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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