She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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