Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
what day is it and did you see me today?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You made out with two different species that night
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Randomize
