i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
