she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
