I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
