i always forget guys have bellybuttons
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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