I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Buhtt sex?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
