i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
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Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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