my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize