so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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