Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize