tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize