the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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