all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
