It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I just gift wrapped bread.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
