she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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