Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?

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(908): View more from New Jersey

considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one

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(703): View more from Virginia

I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense

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(845): View more from New York

They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(512): View more from Texas

Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...

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(801): View more from Utah

What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."

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(573): View more from Missouri

This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car

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(315): View more from New York

we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.

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