11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
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