We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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