i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
