i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
