I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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