BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
