so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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