i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
