Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
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No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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