you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
