DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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