dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
my nose is crying tears of wow.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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