He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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