Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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